Turns out everything we think we know about dating is wrong. Or at least, it’s not entirely right.

Here’s how this all started: Every week I get several dozen emails from both guys and women asking for advice for dating but lately, I’ve started to feel like I’m living that movie Groundhog Day.

You know the movie where Bill Murray has to live out the same day over and over and over again? Every week, I keep getting the same complaints from both men and women about the opposite sex (men don’t want commitment, women are only looking to date men with money, you know the drill.)

What keeps this from being just another whine-fest is that these very same ladies and gentlemen tell me earnestly that these stereotypes do not apply to them. These guys may think that the ladies are only in it for the cold hard cash, but they swear up and down that they’re just looking for a nice woman they can spend all of eternity with.

The girls tell me that all guys want is bedroom action but they swear they’re just looking for Mr. Wonderful, whether he’s a teacher, an insurance adjuster, or the guy who rides on the back of the trash truck. The most common complaint hurled at men? Shallow.

So, I plowed through the mountain of emails cluttering up my desktop and set out to prove or disprove the top seven relationship stereotypes. And, in an effort to be fair and not just take the women’s side, I asked my pal and fellow love guru Michael Alvear,  author of The Flirty Text Message Helper to weigh in as well.

So here it is, dahlings:  Our seven biggest dating myths. Busted.  (Mostly.)

Myth # 1: Men only want to date beautiful women

Okay, it helps. Men are visual, and we are all, genetically programmed to seek out the healthiest, genetically sound, and most fertile mate we can snag for our own. But for lots of guys, beauty, at least in the supermodel-y way we ladies tend to fret over, is not the be all end all for guys.

Thom, dater who hails from Toronto says, “It’s important for me to be attracted to the women I date, for certain. But I’ve dated and been attracted to a number of women who have some great feature that drove me crazy, like amazing lips or fantastic legs, who might not be considered beautiful in the traditional sense. The whole, ‘beauty is in the eye of the beholder’ thing is true, at least for me. I tend to go for women who are smart, with a really bizarre sense of humor.”

Micheal Alvear’s take: “Yes. It’s not that we don’t want the rest of the goodies — personality, kindness, humor, etc.  It’s that we want all those gifts wrapped in a beautiful box!”

Myth # 2: Women only want to date the rich men

Sure, a big fat bank account is appealing for many women, but lots just want to date someone who is  practical, responsible, and a decent human being. And sometimes, taking a look at how a guy handles his finances is one way to determine how he’s managing the rest of his life.

Patrice, a dater from the D.C. area says the whole money myth is just that, a myth. “That is a lie perpetuated by unsuccessful men (financially or in dating.) There are plenty of wealthy women who go after broke/less financially stable men in the name of love. Look at Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon or J Lo and her backup dancer. It is true though that many women seek some financial stability when they start to look for a potential spouse, but not all women. And finances are usually not the only factor.”

This brings to mind a quote from my favorite Marilyn Monroe movie, Gentlemen Prefer Blondes:

“Don’t you know that a man being rich is like a girl being pretty? You wouldn’t marry a girl just because she’s pretty, but my goodness, doesn’t it help?”

Michael Alvear says: “This myth is busted. Women want to date men who have a car but don’t live in it.”

Myth # 3: Men want sex, not commitment

Yes, men want sex. But many of them also harbor the same desires we tend to attribute to women — commitment, love, a family. When we assume that guys are only dating for sex, we do them a terrible disservice. Plus, the them versus us mentality isn’t doing us any big favors either.

Unfortunately, this is the thing we ladies tell ourselves when the relationship we’d hoped for doesn’t get any traction. (Guys, before you start working yourself into a lather of righteous indignation, remember you do the very same thing with the whole “all women are gold diggers” mantra.)

It takes two to tie the knot, and while the males of the species may have executed the greatest marketing campaign in world history by convincing all the women that they’re doing us a great big favor by walking down the aisle, many men actually do (gasp!) want to be in a committed and happy relationship. (Although sex will do in a pinch if that’s not available.)

Michael Alvear’s take: “Men like to think about relationships like a bacon and eggs breakfast:  The chicken was involved; the pig was committed. We’d rather be the chicken.”

Myth # 4:  The nice guy never gets the girl

Most mentally-stable women actually do want to date a nice guy. The trouble happens not when a man is “too nice” but when he is not masculine enough. Think weenie or doormat.

You can be the nicest guy in the world and still be a guy. That’s what we ladies are looking for.   Don’t let us walk all over you. Don’t “yes dear” us until we’re practically catatonic. And don’t be afraid to take your testosterone out for a spin every once in a while.

Michael Alvear’s take: “Bull. Nice guys EVENTUALLY get the girl.”

Myth # 5: The longer you’ve been dating, the more likely the chances you’ll get married

This ends up being an issue for women a lot more than men. Women believe that the more time they have invested in a relationship, the higher the chances are that said relationship will eventually result in a trip down the aisle. However, in interviewing several hundred men in the research stage for my book Stop Getting Dumped!, I discovered that men know within the first one to two years whether or not they want to marry a woman, and if they don’t feel it by then, the chances are pretty high that they never will.

In other words, after a couple of years, he knows enough about you to make the decision. So why do guys stay in a relationship for years (and years and years) when they’ve already decided that they don’t want to marry you? Because they’re comfortable, and maybe even happy in the relationship, and nothing better has come along to push them out of it.  Like baby birds in the next.  As long as the Momma bird keeps delivering worms to their bedside, there’s really no reason to leave.

As one anonymous dater put it, “My girlfriend and I dated for six years, and the whole time she put the pressure on for a ring. We ended up breaking up and I met my fiancée a few months later. The difference was I knew right away that she was the one I wanted to spend my life with.”

Michael Alvear’s take:  ”Once you’ve passed the three-to-five-year phase, the chances slope down like a bent-necked pack mule.”

Lisa Daily’s take:  Three years, tops.

Myth # 6: Men are intimidated by powerful women

An study of online daters quoted in the best selling book Freakonomics found that once a woman hit $100,000 in income, her appeal as an online dating candidate went down dramatically.

The truth is that only insecure men are intimidated by powerful women. Secure men are not. So instead of thinking of your kick-butt-in-the-boardroom ways as a liability, try looking at it as a way to weed out the needy masses. And remember that for many guys, there’s nothing sexier than a confident woman.

Ben, a dater from San Diego sums it up: “I love powerful women. Bring it on.”

Michael Alvear’s take: ”Yes some men are intimidated by powerful women, but less and less so.”

Myth # 7: Love conquers all

Love, much like spackle, can smooth the cracks of life’s ups and downs, but it’s not a cure-all for abuse, alcohol, drug or gambling addictions, mommy issues, a compulsion to speed or shoplift, or the inability to remain employed.

Some relationships can exacerbate a problem. And some problems are just too big to overcome without some serious professional intervention.

Michael Alvear’s take: “PPFFFT! (the sound of coffee spraying out onto my

screen).  Love ain’t enough.”

Love looks different to everyone. And the good news in all of this, dating stereotypes aside, is that there is at least one universal truth: There is someone for everyone.

Bestselling dating book and romantic comedy author Lisa Daily

This week on Daytime, I’ll be talking about some of the more unusual signs of cheating and my brand new book out today:

Is He Cheating? Crack the cheat code and find out right now if he is cheating or not, why he cheats, and what you need to do next.

A recent study found that either the wife or the husband cheats in 80% of marriages.

What if you could find out if someone is a cheating risk on the first date?  Did you know that the kind of movies a person likes, or looking at their hand can tell you if they’re more likely to cheat?   Read on, and learn some very unexpected signs of a cheating spouse or boyfriend.
Behold, the strangest signs of cheating:

His ring finger is longer than his index finger

One truly odd sign of cheating is that the length of a man’s ring finger is linked to testosterone levels, and interestingly enough, infidelity.  If his ring finger is longer than his index finger, he likely has a higher testosterone level, which means more partners and a significantly higher risk of cheating. If you want to check his finger without calling attention to the fact that you think he might be cheating, tell him you’re concerned about his health — a longer ring finger is also an indicator of lower risk for heart attack.  Or you can tell him that a longer ring finger means he’ll be more successful in business. A University of Cambridge study of 49 male traders found that guys with longer ring fingers earned 10 times more money than men with short ring fingers.

He’s had a brain injury, multiple concussions, or has a history of high contact sports

You might want to rethink the appeal of the great-looking quarterback after this one.  Was your guy a linebacker or a wide receiver on the football team in high school?  Men who have had multiple concussions are more likely to cheat than other men.  Why?  Multiple smacks to the head damage the front lobe of the brain, the part that controls our inappropriate impulses.

He ‘s a gambler

Here we go again, another sign of cheating linked with impulse control issues.  Thrill-seeking guys frequently have the longer DRD4 gene, which makes them more likely to have gambling addictions.  Yes, the same guy who ran up $7,000 on your credit card last month in Vegas probably slept with a showgirl or a hooker in the same weekend. Lucky you.

He loves horror movies

Watch out for this bizarre sign: Men with the cheating gene are more likely to enjoy watching horror movies than other men.  Why?  Men with the longer DRD4 gene (also known as the cheater gene) are much more likely to be attracted to slasher movies than men with the shorter DRD4.

He’s tall

Another disappointing sign? A study reported in Psychology Today reported that tall men are more likely to cheat.  Experts aren’t sure if its related to testosterone, (which may influence not only height but also infidelity) or something else, but it certainly puts a damper on tall, dark and handsome.

He drives a Toyota 

According to Ashley Madison, the dating website for people looking to cheat on their significant other, 20.9% of cheating men drive a Toyota.  The second most popular car for cheating men?  Ford, at 12.3%.

He rolls over and falls asleep after sex
A recent study found that men who engaged in a little pillow talk after sex were more likely to commit and be faithful than men who fell asleep right after. What’s more, a high number of guys who forgo the pillow talk suffer from something called “insecure attachment” which means they have trouble bonding, always need to be in control, and are more likely to have an affair.

Want more? My brand new book Is He Cheating is out today, you can get it for the bargain price of 99 cents on kindle for today only. Don’t have a kindle? Get the free app for your smartphone, iPad, Mac or PC at Amazon when you order.

Need advice for dating? Lisa Daily is the bestselling author of dating books and romantic comedies.

If you want to know if he loves you so, it’s not his kiss you should be worried about — it’s his car, his job, his love of horror movies, and whether he talks or snores immediately after sex. Studies estimate that infidelity occurs in almost 80% of marriages.

Is He Cheating? Crack the cheat code and find out right now if he is cheating or not, why he cheats, and what you need to do next, is a new book from relationships expert Lisa Daily, the best selling author of Stop Getting Dumped!, and the resident love guru on DAYTIME, a nationally-syndicated morning TV show.

Daily says she was inspired to write the book after receiving thousands of letters from women all over the world, “The scenarios are different, but the fear and worry and heartbreak are always the same.  After a while, I started noticing that there were very specific patterns in the behavior of the men who were cheating.  Once I began researching infidelity behavior in-depth, I realized there was a definite and predictable pattern to men’s affairs — everything from what they told their wives and girlfriends to where they stashed the evidence.  This “cheat code” of utterly predictable cheating behavior became the basis of Is He Cheating?.”

In Is He Cheating? Daily answers readers’ most common and “Am I crazy or does this mean something?” questions including identifying men most likely to cheat (men who have a specific “cheater” gene, men who love horror movies, aggressive drivers, men who fall asleep immediately after sex, and doctors and lawyers), and what she calls “doomsday” evidence: “The pre-paid cell phone or secret SIM card.”

Daily’s book also covers topics like the best places and equipment to snoop for clues, tips on protecting your relationship from an affair, the biggest mistakes women make when confronting a man if they think he is cheating, and the cheating red zone most men are knee-deep in every day.

“Infidelity affects women profoundly — the fear, stress, and worry that their partner is cheating spreads like a cancer to every other area of their lives, affecting their jobs, their friendships, their self-esteem, and their children.  Until women find out the truth, their lives just continue to unravel.”

“Once you find the first piece of proof, his entire story starts to fall apart,” Daily says.  “And that’s the first step to getting the resolution you need.”

For more information visit the media room at LisaDaily.com

Download Is He Cheating? Crack the Cheat Code and find out right now if he is cheating or not, why he cheats, and what you need to do next on Kindle or Nook right now, and get the truth now.

It’s bargain priced on Kindle for 99 cents for today only.

Is He Cheating?

In my 6 years as the relationships and infidelity expert on the DAYTIME show, and my 4 years as a relationship advice columnist before that, cheating questions have always been some of the most prevalent requests for advice for dating that I’ve received from women — everything from “Is he cheating on me?” to “How can I make him stop?” to “Why is that tramp always trying to steal my man?”

It’s heartbreaking.

This is why, after several years of collecting more information on cheating and cheaters than any person should need in a lifetime of dating jerks, I decided to write a book  So even when you’re on the verge of a nervous breakdown, and it’s all you can do to stop yourself from hurling your plate at the (alleged) lying, cheating, jerk, you can find out what you need to know.

I hope you never need it.  But if you do, at least you can find out the truth fast, get the whole stinking thing out in the open and move on with your life.  Finding out the guy you’re in love with is cheating on you is painful.  At least now it doesn’t have to be slow and painful.

xo,

Do you need to find out right now if your husband or boyfriend is having an affair?  Or even just thinking about it?

Are you afraid your partner might be cheating with another woman?

Are you worried he’s cheating with someone he met online?

Are you starting to feel that something has changed in your relationship?

Are you feeling stressed and anxious, feeling like you might be going crazy, and wondering what is really going on?

If you’re like a lot of women, you may suspect your partner is cheating.
Maybe he’s been acting differently lately, odd little things that leave you feeling unsettled:  Maybe he keeps mentioning the same woman from work. Maybe his phone is off when you need to reach him.  Maybe he’s distant, disconnected, or he’s picking a lot of fights lately. Maybe you can’t quite put your finger on it, but something’s off.  You can feel it.
You try to trust him, but you can’t help but picture him with another woman, maybe someone you know — your friend or neighbor — maybe even in your own bed. (It happens more than you’d think!)

85% of women who suspect their partner is cheating are right.

There’s a reason those alarm bells are going off in your head, that you can’t seem to shake the feeling that something bad is happening.

We know how you feel: You feel sick every time you think about it.  You feel betrayed and humiliated and ashamed.  You don’t understand what went wrong, why he feels the need to cheat on you with someone else.  Why aren’t you enough for him?

You’re not alone.

What you need is help and support — some proven advice to find out right now, for sure, if your partner is cheating on you or not.  And even more importantly, what you should do next. That’s why Lisa Daily, infidelity expert on the DAYTIME show and best selling author of numerous relationship advice books, wrote Is He Cheating? : Crack the cheat code and find out right now if he is cheating or not, why he cheats, and what you need to do next.  It’s a detailed, step-by-step plan to finding out the truth about whether or not he’s cheating on you.  Lisa holds your hand every step of the way –from validating your suspicions to gathering evidence to teaching you exactly what to say to him to get the truth you need.

Find out:

• The types of men most likely to have an affair, and how to spot men who are genetically-programmed to cheat
• The reason WHY he cheats (It’s not what you think!)
• How to affair-proof your relationships with men
• The unmistakable and easy-to-spot signs he’s cheating on you
• The single best place to look for evidence if you suspect he’s having an affair
• How to become a human lie detector and know instantly if he’s telling the truth what he’s been doing –  or catch him in a lie on the spot
• What you need to do right this minute if you think he’s cheating
• What you should say to the other woman
• How to keep yourself from going crazy while you figure out what you want to do next
• The biggest mistake you can make when confronting your partner about his affair that can keep you from ever learning the truth
• How to move on once you learn the truth about the affair — whether you stay in your relationship or not

Not knowing the truth is killing you.

The worry and fear you feel is keeping you up at night, making you doubt what’s real and what’s not, making you feel scared and humiliated and alone.  Your relationship is in trouble.  And no matter what you learn when you discover the truth, you can’t continue on the path you’re on.  If it hasn’t already, eventually the stress of the situation will spread like a cancer into every other area of your life – your job, your self-esteem, your other relationships, your kids.  You can’t go on this way.

Find out the truth with the best book on the subject of cheating.

Get  Is He Cheating?  Crack the Cheat Code and find out right now if he is cheating or not, why he cheats, and what you need to do next on Kindle or Nook right now, (out in paperback June 10) and get the truth now.

 What Your Favorite TV Shows Say About You

I’m not sure there’s anyone on the planet who was as excited about the return of Mad Men as I was. Sure, it’s possible, but not very likely.  I was reallllllllly excited.

Anyway, all this obsessing over Mad Men got me thinking about a Media Mindset study I covered a while back on DAYTIME that found that viewers of certain shows tended to have similar personality traits.

For example, if you watch me every week on Daytime, you’re quite obviously smart, good-looking, and destined to find true love.

If you watch Mad Men (my all-time favorite show) you’re most likely creative, emotionally sensitive, intellectually curious, and socially liberal. You’re also more likely to choose a Mac over a PC. But hey, who isn’t? (In case you’re wondering — I’d claim “all of the above” on personality traits.)

If you watch The Office, you’re more likely to have a bit of a superiority complex (I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying.) Office watchers are more likely to consider themselves superior to others, believe that they are extraordinary, and, of course, toot their own horns about their accomplishments. Hey, if you’ve got it, flaunt it, right?

Watchers of Glee are most likely creative, open to new things, and searching for unusual and varied experiences in their lives.

If you watch The Real Housewives you’re probably pugnacious (unafraid to tell other people exactly what you think), you value honesty over keeping the peace (what kind of friend would you be if you didn’t tell it like it is?), and probably a leader. Real Housewives fans also like Botox. Seriously!

Watchers of The Biggest Loser are traditional and realistic — which means they work with what they’ve got (marriage, job, kids) and they live in the present. Practical people.

Did you see what whatshername was wearing last night on Dancing With The Stars? Then you’re more likely to be compliant, traditional, respectful of authority, deferential to others, and a person who prefers stability — (and judging from high profile members of the GOP like Tom Delay and Bristol Palin — possibly Republican.)

If you watch Family Guy, you’re probably obnoxious. Oh wait, that’s just my opinion. Here’s what the study said: Family Guy watchers are rebellious, risk-taking, averse to rules and structure, open to challenges, and give their opinions using sarcasm and/or anger. Charming, right?

XO,

Need Advice for Dating? Dating Coach and Relationships Expert Lisa Daily is the bestselling author of two dating books, Stop Getting Dumped!, How to Date Like a Grownup and the totally funny novel Fifteen Minutes of Shame. You’ve seen her everywhere from Entertainment Tonight to the HITCH movie DVD.

Copyright 2001-2012 by Lisa Daily. All Rights Reserved.

Hi all,

Just finished an interview over at DatingSite.org where I talked about my new book coming out April 9, Is He Cheating?

Here’s a little bit of the interview:

You speak on the topic: 7 Signs Your Guy is Cheating. Can you give us three signs?

1. The biggest sign is a change in sexual behavior — either no sex or different sex.  This usually means he’s getting it somewhere else, or learning it somewhere else.
2. A pre-paid cell phone.  No bill, no evidence.
3. He changes his appearance.    Maybe your guy starts working out after six years of bliss on the couch.  Maybe he has a sudden interest in Armani when nacho cheese-covered Chinos have always been just fine.  From a new gym membership to a new cologne, big appearance changes can mean big trouble.’
4. His feet are pointed away from you when you’re together.  Even when we fake our emotions, our body language leaks them.  When you’re in love, your bodies will line up, heart to heart, toes to toes.  If lately his toes are always pointing at someone else, out the door, or just far away from you, you have reason to worry.

Oops, that’s four.

I actually have a list of more than 40 signs of cheating, including where to look for evidence, and the worst way to stage a confrontation in my new book coming out April 24 — Is He Cheating? Crack the cheat code and find out right now if he is cheating or not, why he cheats, and what you need to do next.

You can buy Is He Cheating here

You can read the rest here

#weinergate : Is sexting the same as cheating?

Every week I receive lots of letters from women complaining that their boyfriends or husbands are engaged in a little online lust-fest. Is cybersex really cheating? Does it mean he loves me less? Is looking at porn on the Internet the same as flirting with someone anonymously in a chat room?

Most of the women who write to me believe that cybersex is cheating. Here’s the rub: a surprising number of men (54% in fact, according to Divorce Magazine,) believe it’s not.

Sure, typing words on a keyboard is not exactly the same thing as making out with a stranger in a bar after too many cosmopolitans, or sleeping with a coworker on a business trip. Unfortunately, what women seem to understand that men frequently do not, is that online relationships mean intimacy between two real people, whether they are in the same room (or Jacuzzi) or not.

Lots of guys use Internet flirting or cybersex as a sort of interactive girly magazine, and frankly, they leave their emotions at the bathroom door. The problem is that to women, both the woman in their lives and the woman on the other end of the Facebook profile, the interaction is real. A cyber-relationship holds promise, and to a wife or girlfriend that promise feels like a very real threat.

RELATED: 13 Signs You’re About to Get Dumped

There’s more. According to recent studies, evidence proves there is a high correlation between online cybersex and subsequent real-time sexual affairs. The same study stated that a whopping 31% of people have had an online conversation that has led to real-time sex.

Which means that cybersex, whether you think of it as cheating or not, poses a real hazard to relationships.

So, what can you do to protect your relationship against cyber-nooky? Well, your best defense is to let your partner know exactly what your position is. He’ll either respect your feelings, or he won’t. (Which is telling in itself.) But either way, you’ll know where you stand, and exactly the type of person you’re with.

Ack! I really think you need this dating book!

XO,

Get more free dating advice from the dating coach! Sign up for Lisa’s free Dating Tips newsletter and get *5 Secrets to Make the Guys Go Gaga!* We never share/sell your info.

Need Advice for Dating? Dating Coach and Relationships Expert Lisa Daily is the bestselling author of two dating books, Stop Getting Dumped!, How to Date Like a Grownup and the totally funny novel Fifteen Minutes of Shame. You’ve seen her everywhere from Entertainment Tonight to the HITCH movie DVD.

Is it Romantic Armageddon or Uncomfortable Shoes? 13 Warning Signs You’re About To Get Dumped!

Want to know if your relationship is about to hit the skids?
Looking for tell-tale signs that your love will last through next week?
Well, look no further. Below you’ll find the “Unlucky 13″ -13 warning signs you’re about to get dumped.

We surveyed a variety of experts to find the most common warning signs a person is about to get dumped –including psychologists, body language experts, graphologists, private investigators and a divorce attorney. And here’s what we found:

1. Is it romantic Armageddon, or uncomfortable shoes?
Where the toes point, the heart follows. According to body language expert Patti Wood, MA, CSP, you should, “look at your sweetie’s feet when you are out with other people.” She says, “if they are pointed at you, great.” If they’re pointed at someone else, your partner may be looking to walk.

2. You’re starting to feel like a telemarketer.
Is your sweetie anxious to end phone conversations right away? A person who knows she’s going to end the relationship with you, but hasn’t done so yet will be itching to get off the phone with you. If she is talking to you, but not adding anything to the conversation it’s sign she is heading towards the finish line. She’s probably just pacing herself.

3. He’s no longer interested in sex, or worse, he has a new bag of tricks and a trapeze with the tags still on it.
A dramatic change in sexual behavior can mean two things:

a) He wants to avoid any situation where he might have to express emotion or attachment to you, or

b) He’s getting it somewhere else.

4. He avoids talking about the future.

We’re not just talking the general, garden-variety aversion that men have to discussing relationships. We’re talking about a man who avoids having one of those “we have to talk” talks like it’s a shot of the Plague. As for the future, when next Thursday seems like too much of a commitment, it could be because he’s trying to extricate himself by Wednesday night.

RELATED: Are you a bad date?

5. He says, “I need some space” or “I think we should see other people.”

According to psychologist Jesse Rabinowitz, Ph.D, people don’t usually want to hurt someone else, so they use “exit strategies.” By telling you he wants to see other people, he’s not technically breaking up with you (so no big crying scene to endure) but he’s given himself a way out. Of course, the second he gets a little distance, he’s going to make a run for it.

6. If she’s looking left, something’s not right.
According to Bill Raduenz, private investigator, a person who looks up into the air and to the left when she speaks to you is “not being truthful.” The look left is an indication we’re using the “creative” side of our brains and a good indicator she’s telling you a whopper.

7. He gives you that little pat on the back.
Watch out for this one. A person who gives you a hug while patting you on the back is indicating that they are uneasy. According to Raduenz, the “hand pat” on the back indicates someone is uncomfortable with what they’re doing. The bigger the pat, the more discomfort they feel.

There’s more. Another important sign that things may not be going well is the amount of contact during a hug. Full frontal contact is good. The one-shoulder hug, or pulling away in other areas could be a sign the person is “distancing” in the relationship. If it’s a new relationship, the other person may not be quite ready for that level of physical contact. If it’s an established relationship, it could be a sign the person is pulling away, or getting ready to break off the relationship.

8. You don’t like what you see in the mirror.
People mirror each other’s body language when they are in love with similar gestures, voice volume, etc. If you’re noticing the two of you are out of sync, you probably are.

That’s not all. According to body language expert Wood, a person who is about to dump you will display a lack of open “windows” towards you. “Windows” being his heart, eyes, neck and palms. If your man turns his heart (the center of his chest) away from you as you are talking to each other, it’s a big sign he’s not interested.

9. You see the writing on the wall.
According to graphologist Karen Weinberg, QDE, a person who is thinking of ending a relationship will show clues in her handwriting. When writing the word “love” she may begin to drop down the letter “e.” Another sign to watch for is if your partner diminishes the size of your name (sign of your importance to her.)

10. Every normal person should know which way the toilet paper goes…
If she’s picking silly fights, or there’s an unusual increase in emotional distance, you’ve got bad news. According to Melvyn Frumkes, an attorney specializing in divorce, “a person who picks nonsensical arguments is trying to get the other person (you) to make the first move.”

RELATED: Advice for speed dating

11. He keeps you waiting. And waiting. And waiting.

“Time is an important non-verbal communicator,” says Wood. If he keeps you waiting, it’s a sign his interest is waning, and a sign of disrespect.

This is true for dates as well. If he starts waiting until the very last minute to make date plans with you, it’s likely he’s lost interest, or he’s hoping something better will come along and he’s using you as a back-up.

Ack! I really think you need this dating book!

12. She buys a personal pager, or a pre-paid cell phone.
This is bad news. Just about every private investigator in the book will tell you the pager purchase is a sign of impending heartbreak. Sure, it could be for work, but more likely, she’s using it to get a head start on her post-you life. Beep Beep – Bye Bye.

13. He used to be a three-blue-shirts-and-four-pair-of-Chinos kind of guy, and suddenly he’s obsessed with Armani.
According to Attorney Mel Frumkes, a person who is about to leave (or is cheating) will take greater care with his appearance – updating his wardrobe, losing weight, working out and even changing cologne. If your sweetie looks like he just finished taping an episode of “A Makeover Story” – Those Chinos might not be the only dud he’s looking to lose.

Want to know when you’re most likely to get the axe? Most experts agree it’s somewhere in the neighborhood of the first 3-5 months. So, stock up on tissues and Ben & Jerry’s if you’re heading into the danger zone.

Only time (and his shoes) will tell.

XO,

Get more free dating advice from the dating coach! Sign up for Lisa’s free Dating Tips newsletter and get *5 Secrets to Make the Guys Go Gaga!* We never share/sell your info.

Need Advice for Dating? Dating Coach and Relationships Expert Lisa Daily is the bestselling author of two dating books, Stop Getting Dumped!, How to Date Like a Grownup and the totally funny novel Fifteen Minutes of Shame. You’ve seen her everywhere from Entertainment Tonight to the HITCH movie DVD.
 

Be sure to tune in to Daytime on Tuesday, April 12 when I’ll be talking about how beauty can be the kiss of death in your relationship

Advice for Dating: The Ugly Truth About Dating A Gorgeous Woman

A recent study published in the UK’s Daily Mail found that there’s an unexpected downside to dating a beautiful woman — Relationships where the woman is more attractive than the man are more likely to fail.

What did the study find? Basically, if the woman is more attractive than the man, the relationship will only last a few months.

RELATED ADVICE FOR DATING: Men Only Want to Date Beautiful Women & Other Myths

How did the study explain the many romances of Angelina Jolie? Now, she’s a perfect case study, isn’t she? Angelina Jolie + Billy Bob Thorton = doom. Angelina Jolie + Jonny Lee Miller = Big Fizzle. Angelina Jolie + Brad Pitt = her longest-running and most-successful relationship. Why? Brad Pitt is one of about 6 men on the planet who is equally attractive to the lovely Angelina. Billy Bob didn’t stand a chance.

Why would the fact that the woman is more attractive set the relationship up for failure? Frankly, beautiful women have more options.

Does having a more handsome boyfriend or husband doom the relationship?
Interestingly enough, no. So feel free to date Brad Pitt if Angelina decides to move on.

All for now. For more advice for dating, check out Stop Getting Dumped!, which has a lot of good info on finding someone who is right for you.

XO,

Have a question for Lisa Daily? Leave a comment below.

Get more free dating advice from the dating coach! Sign up for Lisa’s free Dating Tips newsletter and get *5 Secrets to Make the Guys Go Gaga!* We never share/sell your info.

More Advice for Dating:

ASK LISA : He never called after I slept with him

What Your Favorite Pizza Topping Says About Your Lovelife

Do You Need A Dating Coach?

Top Reasons Men Dump Their Girlfriends

Need Advice for Dating? Dating Coach and Relationships Expert Lisa Daily is the bestselling author of two dating books, Stop Getting Dumped!, How to Date Like a Grownup and the totally funny novel Fifteen Minutes of Shame. You???ve seen her everywhere from Entertainment Tonight to the HITCH movie DVD.

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Be sure to tune in to Daytime on Tuesday, April 5 when I’ll be talking about which low-risk questions you should ask on a first date to find out what you really want to know

Advice for Dating: First Date Questions That Give the Answers to Unspeakable Truths

Everybody knows that first dates are awkward, mostly because you’re trying to learn as much about the person as you can in the least amount of time, without getting a drink thrown in your face, or ditched the second you head for the ladies room. But how can you find out what you really want to know about your date’s views on commitment, or politics or religion if it’s rude to come right out and ask?

Once again, the genius number crunchers over at OKCupid compiled and sifted through the data of their 7 million or so members, looking for questions that were fairly benign and easy to ask, but that correlated to some deeper, unspeakable truth. (As in, what are the chances that you and I are going to end up in a relationship, or, you know, bed?) The questions are weird, for sure. But they might just give you all the answers you’re looking for.

What question should you ask if you want to know if you’re going to get lucky on the first date?

Ask: Do you like the taste of beer?
Why? People who like the taste of beer are 60% more likely to think it’s okay to sleep with someone on the first date. True for both men and women, straight and gay.

What question should you ask if you want to know if you and your date have long term potential?
Ask 3 questions actually:
Do you like horror movies?
Have you ever traveled around another country alone?
Wouldn’t it be fun to chuck it all and go live on a sailboat?

What they say doesn’t matter so much as whether or not their answers match with yours. 32% of successful couples agreed on all three questions, which 3.7 times the usual. What’s more interesting — these questions were a better predictor than sharing beliefs in God, sex & smoking.

What question should you ask if you want to know if you and your date share the same politics?

Ask: Do you prefer the people in your life to be simple or complex?

If your date answers “simple” they’re most likely (2:1) a republican, if they answered “complex” they’re most likely a dem (2:1).

What question should you ask if you want to know if your date is religious?

Ask: Do spelling and grammar mistakes annoy you?

If your date answers no, they’re not particularly annoyed with bad grammar and spelling???the odds of he or she being at least moderately religious is slightly better than 2:1.

Bad spelling and grammar make me crazy. I’m not sure if this is because I’m a writer, or because I’m not particularly religious. (I have a strong faith, I just find it tough to get on board with organized religion.)

All for now. For more on what to do on a first date, check out Stop Getting Dumped!, which has a lot of first date strategies.

XO,

Have a question for Lisa Daily? Leave a comment below.

Get more free dating advice from the dating coach! Sign up for Lisa’s free Dating Tips newsletter and get *5 Secrets to Make the Guys Go Gaga!* We never share/sell your info.

More Advice for Dating:

ASK LISA : He never called after I slept with him

What Your Favorite Pizza Topping Says About Your Lovelife

Do You Need A Dating Coach?

Top Reasons Men Dump Their Girlfriends

Need Advice for Dating? Dating Coach and Relationships Expert Lisa Daily is the bestselling author of two dating books, Stop Getting Dumped!, How to Date Like a Grownup and the totally funny novel Fifteen Minutes of Shame. You???ve seen her everywhere from Entertainment Tonight to the HITCH movie DVD.

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Visit our free chatrooms today
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?? Copyright 2001- 2011 by Lisa Daily. All Rights Reserved.