The Bachelorette Betrayal : Bachelor Ed Swiderski Allegedly Cheated With 2 Other Women. Why Jillian Should Leave Now.

August 13, 2009

**Bachelorette photo courtesy of ABC**

On the July 27 Bachelorette reveal, Bachelorette winner and Microsoft consultant Ed Swiderski got down on one knee and proposed to Bachelorette Jillian Harris.

“You’re everything I could ask for in a woman,” Swiderski gushed.

He didn’t exactly say the same thing to Bethany Steffen when she told him she was coming to his apartment to pick up some belongings a week after his proposal to Jillian, texting her:


Ah, the romance.

US Weekly reports in their “Timeline of Deception” that the entire time Ed was on the show competing for his future bride Jillian’s attention, he was also sleeping with and embroiled in relationships with two other women; Lindsey Johnson (a woman he’d dated for more than a year, and promised to propose to be the end of the year)?? and Bethany Steffen.?? In fact, US Weekly reports that Ed slept with Lindsey on June 4, a week into his engagement.

For those of you who missed the show this season, let me catch you up:

Ed bowed out after episode 5, telling Bachelorette Jillian that he needed to return to work.?? Instead, he went home and slept with both Bethany and Lindsey.?? Then, he dramatically reappeared in week 7, claiming to Jillian that he had “reprioritized” his lovelife and wanted to come back.

Ed sure is a busy guy.

Fast forward a few weeks, and Ed is on his knee, offering Jillian his heart and a comped three-carat diamond ring.

“I want to be with you forever,” Swiderski told Jillian, “I want a family with you.?? I want you to give me a hard time when we’re 80 years old.”

The fact that Ed already had a girlfriend was no secret on the Bachelorette set. Former contestant Wes Hayden told Us Magazine, ???Dave (Good) and I both remember Ed saying he had a girlfriend.??? Hayden added, ???But we are not the kind who are going to run our mouths.???

Jillian seems relatively unfazed by the recent reports of Ed’s infidelity.?? In a recent interview with People magazine she said, “I was falling in love with two other guys two days before we got engaged.” She

“That’s a double standard, Jillian continues, “If he had feelings for these two other girls while he was on the show, that’s normal.”

Feelings??? Yes.?? Rabid deception? No.

The problem with Ed Swiderski isn’t that he had feelings for someone else (or two someone elses) when he started the show.?? The problem is in the manipulative, self-serving way that he deceived all three women.

These are not the actions of a man in love.

These are the actions of a man who will most likely cheat again.?? The warning signs are written all over the wall.?? And Jillian, wouldn’t you rather find out now, than in 6 or 7 years when you’ve got two kids, a mortgage and a life?

If you stay with a cheater, you’re just cheating yourself.?? Find someone who truly deserves you.


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Dating Coach and Relationships Expert Lisa Daily is the bestselling author of two dating books, Stop Getting Dumped!, How to Date Like a Grownup and the totally funny novel Fifteen Minutes of Shame. You???ve seen her everywhere from Entertainment Tonight to the HITCH movie DVD.

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